Posted by: seasin | July 17, 2009

Things that make my heart warm up

This week, I received bad news about my mum-she’s ill and she’s not looking after herself and she managed to get herself in hospital-not for a long time, but she gave us a good scare.

So I’ve been cranky and sad and not able to focus on anything, because even if I’m not quite mummy’s girl and I chose to live far away from her, I’m still getting all teared up when I think about her being ill and suffering.

But because my sweetie, my friends and my colleagues don’t deserve to be confronted with a cranky, irritated Transilvanian that has nothing but criticism, moaning and snarling sarcasm coming out of her pretty mouth on daily basis, this morning I made myself breath deeply, then think for ten minutes about all the things that are good in my life and in the world in general, and make my heart warm up.

So here are the things that picked me up from the pit of dispair this morning and put a smile on my lips.

1. A bright summer morning, with skies so blue that I wish I could take a handfull and wrap myself in it-I’m sure it would feel like cool silk. A morning with the promise of glorious sun and baking heat, a morning with bright crisp light. Nothing evil can happen on a day that starts like this.

2. My sweetie asleep near me, his face peaceful and oh so kissable.

3. A hot shower-water running down my skin, undoing knots in my muscles, chasing sleep away, pampering and cleaning.

4. The fig tree in front of our building. Green figs plumping up, a promise of sinful sweetnes almost fulfilled, in the middle of a filthy, dusty and polluted town. I’m saying ‘hello’ to those figs every morning. In my mind of course, DB already thinks I’m raving mad as it is.

5. The sight of the borrowed cot taking up a huge amount of space in our spare bedroom. No, I don’t have any ‘news’ for you, other than the fact that DB’s brother is visiting with his family, his lovely wife and sweet, sweet babies. Well, technically only one is a baby, the eldest is a toddler. The thought of babies running around, babbling and smelling of…well, babies in our flat puts a smile on my face no matter how sad I am. And no, I have no craving to become a mum anytime soon. The fact they’ll only be there for a week just makes me appreciate the thought of having them over even more :). Can’t wait to fuss over them, play with them and stuff my nose in their necks to get lungfulls of baby smell. Told you I’m nuts (and yes, I’m still positive I don’t want to produce one of my own. For now at least). And oh, the thought of DB having baby&toddler around for a week fills me up with laughter. Oh I can’t possibly be sad and cranky when I think of that 🙂

6. My green and turquoise sandals. Those with the high heels and consisting only of two really thin straps and really thin laces that tie around the ankle. I love them so much I could put them under my pillow when I sleep. I know, I’m shallow. And crazy. But I’m an addict to beauty in all its forms and incarnations, and those shoes are a work of art.

7. My ring with a huge topaz. Very simple, very narrow gold band with a giant blue topaz. It was a gift from a friend (girl-friend, that is), and I love wearing it when I’m sad. It’s like wearing on my finger a cocktail of that afore-mentioned morning summer sky, blended with a hefty dose of warm sea water. It is said that topaz dispells sadness, anger and nocturnal fears, warns its wearer of poisons and protects her from sudden death. Of course that’s a load of bull but it still is a gorgeous stone and it sure as hell dispells my sadness when I look at it on my finger.

8. The red cat picture on our front room wall. Same picture that’s the header of this blog. Take a look at it and you’ll understand why. Cats are the most amazing creatures in the known universe. Together with horses and dolphins. It all has to do with my endless craving for beauty, elegance and harmony.

9. The smell of coffee in the morning. I’m not a big coffee drinker, but in that as well I’m a snob. A twisted snob. I love a perfectly roasted hot expresso. And then I like to pour a load of milk over it, therefore inducing all espresso-drinkers to snub me. Whatever. I love the way it smells.

10. Jazz on the radio while I drive to work. Ella Fitzgerald’s voice singing “Instead of making conversation, make love to me…”.

The world is right again now. And my mum feels a bit better. I know, I just called her.


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